The Belinda Affair...

Kim at the Upward Call asked what I think of the Belinda affair in the comments. So I thought I would post a few thoughts on the matter.

Belinda Stronach was touted a 'moderate conservative' by our media. They gave her credit for making the Canadian Alliance party seem a little less right wing and therefore more palatable to the average Canadian. So they have portrayed her defection to the Liberal party as being a real blow to the conservative CA.

But what makes a 'moderate conservative' moderate? I believe she was liberal minded while being fiscally conservative. Should it really surprise us that someone who is overall liberal in her thinking should be tempted to join the Liberal party when offered a cabinet post? Certainly, she made a move to advance her own career. But switching sides is unthinkable for anyone who truly holds conservative values for our country.

Was Belinda's decision to cross the floor disappointing? For sure. But I'm not convinced she was really a true conservative in the first place. I'm convinced a true conservative could never in good conscience join the Liberals and that in the midst of proven corruption and a party more interested in hanging onto power by any means, including pursuing Belinda Stronach in the first place.

Could have been a big mistake....

Yesterday, I was planning on mowing the lawn. It sounded odd and was bellowing out plenty of blue smoke so I made one round and just stopped where I was. As I was telling Ladger about it, I mentioned putting in gas. He looked at me, "Did you say gas?" Certain episodes of Amazing Race came to mind as I sheepishly asked if the lawn mower was a diesel engine. So last evening, Ladger had the unenviable job of cleaning up that mess. Thank goodness I did stop when I heard it acting funny.

One thing I was curious about was how well the mower was marked as a diesel. It did have a sticker but up where one really wouldn't notice when fueling up. Needless to say I won't be doing that again!

I'm having a lazy day today - it's cold and rainy and I'm more than happy to curl up with a good book and relax my day away. But I enjoyed our recital immensely last night! Did I ever mention that I work with the best group of young people? They made me so proud of them....I get a little teary-eyed. A little guy in grade two started off with playing Oh Canada and I think it threw him off a bit when everyone stood up as he was playing. But he played it like a little trooper - very well done especially considering this has been his first year with piano lessons. All the way through to the end where we heard a young man sing "Home" by Michael Buble. It was such a mix of piano, vocal and guitar - beginner to advanced. What a privilege I have to be involved in the lives of these young people - sharing my own love of music with some really talented kids.

So, while I'm looking forward to the summer break you can bet I'll be looking forward to starting up again in the Fall.

I had an awesome evening and came home to be blessed once again. It was about 10 pm (past bedtime) and as soon as I drove in, Rory came flying out the door excited about something in his hands. It was a bird he'd rescued from the cat earlier that evening. Ladger had told him he could keep him until I got home and then he had to let him go. So he gently kissed him on the head and set him outside on our deck.

We checked in the morning and the bird had died in the night so Ladger took it away. Later, the first thing that Rory did was to see if his bird had gone. And when he didn't see him he came and told me that he flew away and how he'd miss him so much. Sad and beautiful...

Some things are coming to an end...

And I can't say I'm sorry! Ladger is out today to finish off his seeding. He just has about 30 acres (which is not much) but has to switch between two crops (takes a little extra time). I'm just about doin' a jig.

And...yesterday was my the last music lessons this year. The recital is tonight. I spent some time this morning setting the sound system and chairs up. And I'm antsy. I believe I get as nervous as my students do.

So tomorrow I will be a 'free' woman. Our lives will get back into a more typical schedule and I have one extra day a week for all the other things that need to get done. SUMMER, Here I come!!

Bedtime buddies!

Star Wars made me think...

I had a date on Saturday! It's been awhile since Ladger and I went out for dinner and a movie and it was nice. We went to see Episode III of Star Wars. The movie was visually tiring for us old folks - I really enjoyed the drive home - so peaceful...the airspace wasn't filled with flying objects!!! I did enjoy the movie for how it set up the original Star Wars trilogy. But it seems I can watch nothing without analyzing the messages in it.

The line that stuck out the most was that that which is absolute is evil. And democracy is good. First of all, democracy is only as good as the goodness of the majority of people. In Canada, it appears that the majority are willing to overlook a very corrupt government...a government that will do anything to keep its grip on power. And as a result democracy has lost its luster. I do prefer a democracy over a monarchy because our history points out very few who were able to rule well with that kind of power. The odds are in favor of ruthlessness, iron fist and lack of accountability to anyone.

But the one government system that is ideal is theocracy. The Bible talks about a period of time when our Creator reigns on this earth and it will be a time like no other. And then I will be only too glad to see democracy go.

We live with absolute things all the time. We are either alive or dead. We are either here or there. There is no in between...no relative position. But if I say we are either right or wrong, many would have a problem with that as they would see the lines blurred and all of morality is in a gray haze. Things that are absolute are not evil in and of themselves just as tolerance is not a virtue (it's what we're tolerant of that can make it a good thing).

If God is an absolute and if He is the God of the Bible than He is absolutely good without so much as a speck of evil within Him. That's an absolute I trust my life with. And His Kingdom one day will blow our poor struggling democracy out of the water. Woohoo!!!

AAccckk! I've been tagged...

This one's from Geannie - about movies!

1. The total number of movies I own on DVD/video: Two DVD's...no make that three as I received Alice in Wonderland from a cereal box. And the only movies I have on video have been taped from the television.
I can think of only three.

2. Last movie I bought: I bought Shrek II last Christmas.

3. Last movie I watched: Episode III of Star Wars

4. Five movies that mean a lot to me:

1. Lord of the Rings - loved the books, loved the movies
2. Can that one count for three?
3. The Matrix - loved figuring out the twisted logic and backwards thinking
4. The Seventh Seal - I think that's the name - first movie I ever went to the theater to see - didn't love the movie though
5. I enjoy lots of movies but few mean anything to me - I did enjoy the Bourne Identity. At least I can remember it :-)

5. Tag 3 people: I'm gonna cop out and just say that anyone who'd like to participate, please feel free and let me know 'cause I'd love to read your answers.

And this is my big bare patch. It is actually my baby orchard. Right now I've got 4 apple trees, three crabapple trees, 3 pear trees, 2 apricot trees, 3 cherry trees, 4 saskatoon bushes, gooseberry, currant, strawberries blueberries, rhubarb and a plum tree in here. It doesn't look like much yet :-) My garden is a the back of this patch - you can see last years corn stalks if you look close!

Here's Rory planting his potatoes. This morning, the first thing he wanted to do was plant his corn, peas and carrots. He's urging me to hurry up!!

A Day of Firsts....

The first time I charged up a dead battery on my own. The lawn mower was dead from sitting all winter.

The first time I mowed the lawn this year.

The first sunburn of the season.

The day was just a little crazy. Ladger was seeding so I'm his voice, legs, feet, hands when he's not available for certain things. Yesterday we were expecting a semi-truck to pick up some peas we had sold. He was new to the yard so Ladger asked me to direct him to where they had set the auger up under a bin. So I worked outside to be sure I would know when the truck was coming. So when I heard it, I had to make a run for it carrying Paxton with Rory trailing behind. And it's a fair distance to get there and to make it before the truck does.

Then I had to set up the charger on the lawnmower. I finally got it moved over to our yard before lunch and then I had to hurry and get that ready and out to Ladger in the field. Once Paxton was settled for his nap, I intended to get mowing.

But...the wings were up and I COULD NOT figure out how to lower them. So I radioed Ladger and he was trying to explain it to me and it took awhile for me to see how it was hooked up. And then it literally took every bit of brute force I could muster (and plenty of tears) to undo them. I literally had to dig my shoulder into the wings to push them up so I could move a latch - and it took several tries on each side. It's been awhile since I've had to work so hard at something! Yesterday the lawn got mowed out of sheer determination and nothing else. Today I'm stiff and sore (and burnt) but satisfied because it rained last night and is expected to rain again today.

I have to laugh at myself though. I tend to cry when I'm extremely frustrated. I can just imagine guys' reaction to that. What good are tears going to do? But it's an outlet and I don't mind admitting that I'm totally female! But Rory is turning into a typical guy. He got on the radio while I was crying and told Ladger that he'd better come home right now because Mom needs him. Bless his little heart!

Warfare...

Yesterday I went to war on the dandelions in my flowerbeds. My lawn gets sprayed every fall but there are always a few that survive anyway. And this spring I can see a whole section of my lawn that got missed - Dandelion city! Most of the dandelions are easy to dig up. But the ones that are insidious are the ones that come up right beside a tulip or inside a shrub or in the middle of a clump of iris. Trying to remove them without hurting my plants is challenging.

Weeds remind me of sin. Prolific and invasive. Having it removed from our hearts can be painful as it wraps itself so deeply in us. I'm so thankful that I can rely on the Master Gardener who treats me with such care even when weeds surround me, grow up within me and threaten to choke me out.

When I'm finished my job, I sit back and take delight in my flowerbeds. How much more must our Creator delight in us as He continues to work within us. "He reached down from heaven and rescued me...He led me to a place of safety; He rescued me because He delights in me." 2 Sam 22:17,20

Paxton is not a great napper. He tends to play himself out and then just sleep anywhere at all. Here he is fast asleep in the doorway of his bedroom.

Here's another where he curled up on a blanket in the middle of the living room.

Conflict and Complaints....

Thanks to all who have prayed and been so kind and understanding in your comments - what a beautiful thing and I appreciate each of you so much!

There is something beautiful about conflict that gets resolved. We all have conflicts with people in our lives - human nature. But when we humble ourselves and seek restitution - those conflicts turn into opportunity for stronger bonds and greater understanding of others and ourselves. Yesterday, I experienced that with my MIL. She told me she loves me when I gave her a hug after talking through our differences. That's something I'll treasure for a long time!

So all is well and the sun is out in full force...in my heart. Outside is a different story. We're getting a beautiful rain. Too bad all of our crop isn't in the ground. We just started on our lentils and have about 800 acres to go - that's about a good week of seeding and we'll be done.

Farmer's have a bit of reputation for being complainers around here - maybe everywhere. The weather never co-operates with us. We complain about how dry it's been but when it rains in the middle of seeding or haying, we complain again. We complain about the government. We complain about environmentalists who've been heard in Ottawa about getting rid of the only poison that effectively gets rid of gophers. I wish they had gophers eating up their revenue and tearing up their yard and see how they'd feel about it then. We complain about low prices on the world market - no one wants to pay for their food. We complain about the high costs of farming - and they are high! But the latest complaint I've heard from a few makes me laugh.

We have a national weather channel. And farmers on the prairies are upset because the weather forecaster stands in the middle of the screen as the map behind her shows the movement of the jetstream. She(he) stands right in front of Saskatchewan!!! Most Canadians don't really care too much about the weather - doesn't affect their livelihood - probably just their weekend plans most of the time. But Saskatchewan!!! We actually 'watch' the weather channel and the jet stream is surprisingly important to the lot of us! The whole thing makes me laugh as I can just imagine the looks on the faces of the producers of this show when they get their emails or letters from disgruntled farmers in Saskatchewan.

Fish, strawberries and a little stress...

This morning, on the way to church, Ladger and I were talking at the difference in taste between fish from a fish farm versus those caught in the wild. And the difference between strawberries in our garden versus what we can buy in the grocery store. Plants and animals that are given the exact nutrition and conditions that they need to thrive somehow end up lacking something vital. Maybe what they're missing is stress. My strawberries plants are dealing with frosty nights, too much water and then too little water. They aren't babied and maybe they wish they could trade places with their greenhouse sisters but the results are remarkably different.

Isn't that so like us? We all would love to live a stress-free life but God isn't interested in providing us with a comfortable life. He's seeking to build character within us and as we weather the storms of life something beautiful takes shape in our lives....if we allow God to work in our hearts.

I struggled with some things a couple of days ago... my optimism was struggling and things looked pretty dark. Nothing has changed in my circumstances but it feels like the sun has come out again. May my darkest days be a fork in the road where I choose to trust God no matter what my circumstances.

Maybe someday I'll laugh...

All of a sudden in the last couple of days, I've hit a real low spot in my life.

I'm over-tired for one thing. Every day is a scenario something like this. After a long day being on my own with the kids, I go to bed to wait for Ladger to come home. I know if I fall asleep I'll be a real grouch when he wakes me up....but I usually fall asleep because I can't help it. The entrance to our house is right beside the bedroom and so I wake up when he walks on the deck. And then it's the torture of waiting for him to eat a light lunch, wash up and finally crawl into bed. By then I'm wide awake and sleep eludes me. So I usually get up and go try to 'start over' on the couch. But last night I woke up several times in the night because there was a mouse sharing the living room with me. And then Ladger's awake at 5:30 am. Apparently he can function on much less sleep than me. I'm like a walking basketcase.

And then there is my mother-in-law. I feel like our relationship has deteriorated a lot over the last couple of years. At this point I just want to avoid all contact with her. Unfortunately, she and I have to confer every day on meals for the guys and other farm stuff. We live next to each other and have to work together and right now, it's too much for me. I don't want to answer the phone ('cause it's most likely her) and last night I didn't even return a call. And I have no heart left in me to deal with it all.

I know things will likely feel a lot better in a few days but today I'd appreciate any prayers sent my way!

Unexpected Coffee Break....

Tuesday: Soccer. But the catch was I had agreed to play guitar for a ladies' program that same evening. I went early to set up at the church before soccer and then as I started the car to head to the soccer field, it barely started and sounded terrible! Our pastor's wife happened by and heard it and generously offered her car so I could at least count on getting to soccer and back to the church again.

Coaching four year olds is as fun as I thought it might be. It means I'm constantly on the run the entire time as 'out of bounds' means nothing to these little dudes! I've got a couple of kids that really know what they're about and the rest.....well, hopefully they'll catch on to a few things this season while still having fun.

The music went well and Rory did well during that time. So we headed out to the car to see how it would start. It started and sounded....normal! Whew! So I headed home and barely got out of town before the temperature light came on. I pulled over and waited for the engine to cool down. I took a look under the hood and didn't notice anything obviously wrong. That was how the trip went. I had to stop every few minutes and then drive a couple of minutes... It kept getting worse until I looked around and realized I was close to a friend's house so I headed there to phone home.

So Ladger and his dad and his mom and Paxton showed up. I'm not sure why everyone felt like they had to come but the whole family was there for my big crisis - LOL It turns out the anti-freeze was all gone (apparently there's a slow leak and no one had paid any attention to it for awhile with seeding and all). So it was just a matter of filling it up and we were on our way.

The first thing Ladger said was "Why did you drive all the way off the highway (about 2 miles) to phone?" Men don't get women. I'd rather drive a little farther to a friend's house than just go to the nearest home. Besides we got to visit and have a cup of coffee!!

Wednesday: It's a fog - who knows?

Thursday: I spent the day at school giving lessons, got home, picked up the boys, made supper and headed to the field with it and the boys, had to wait an hour before I could go home again to get our supper (Ladger's dad needed a ride to a different field), held Paxton all evening as he had a fever. This morning he's still pretty lethargic but he slept well all night. Hopefully he'll be feeling better soon.

Happy Birthday

My Baby sister and I. It's her 30th birthday today - don't ask how old that makes me!! She had the greatest hair:flaming red and curly...and a personality to match. Now I'm going to be in trouble. Happy Birthday, Sis!

Special days...

I enjoyed mother's day. We went to church and I got to accompany a young person who sang a solo (with piano) and it went over very well. It always thrills me when the young people I get to work with shine. And then we went for lunch ....to Tacotime. That may seem like an odd choice in our community. The restaurants are all so full on Mother's day that I thought fast food was the way to go. It may not have the ambience but it's so peaceful. We were the only customers over lunch and the boys could wander around as they wished and I enjoyed my meal thoroughly!

And then as the boys took a nap, I played guitar all afternoon because I was asked to accompany a gal who's singing tonight. She asked me Sunday so I had to be sure I could handle the piece before I let her know for sure if I could do it.

So yesterday I met up with her on her lunch break for the oddest practice I've ever had. We both climbed into my half-ton and practiced there in the parking lot :-) Tonight will be a little crazy as I go to the church to bring my guitar and set up and then head to soccer with Rory. And then back to church to play guitar as soon as soccer is over. I'm not sure what I'll do with Rory yet. Maybe he can go to a friend's house for a bit.

What's hiding in my cupboards?

Peekaboo - it's Paxton

Potatoes, flies and hugs...

Last night I planted my potatoes!! I should say Rory (4) and I planted them because he was a big help. I dug the holes. He poured in some fertilizer and worked it into the earth. Then he put a potato in each hole and then I covered them up. We left the watering to do this morning. I want to plant my onions and peas and then that'll be it until the weather warms up a bit more. I had more potatoes than I needed and was going to toss the extras in the compost but Rory refused. He decided he was going to put the extras in his own garden. So I dug him a few holes and he threw in the rest of the potatoes and then I showed him how to hoe the earth back over them and stomp around to pack the dirt. He enjoyed himself thoroughly.

I love spring but as with everything there is a downside. I hate the flies that come with the season. We have cattle north and south of our place and so we're in for lots of flies. And when it's rainy (like it is these days) those guys just want to live in my house. I think they're getting in through my office window because there were quite a few in here this morning. So I dug out my fly-zapper (looks like a tennis racket) and had myself a little game this morning. Now it's time to get out the vacuum and get rid of the losing team.

I watched a couple of minutes of Dr Phil about Mother's Day. I don't expect much for Mother's Day because my kids are so young (they have no idea what that day's about) and it's about the last thing on Ladger's mind at this time of year. So I figured there's no point in watching a show that might make me feel sorry for myself. All I need to do is spend some time with my boys and give them both a big hug and the affection they return to me is really what it's all about anyway!

Designed to Work...

It's a rainy day but so far it's just spitting and I'm sure Ladger is seeding anyway.

Last evening after I spent the day teaching music lessons, I planted five Larch trees with the help of the boys. Paxton soaked Rory with the hose and then started crying 'cause his own hands were wet and cold. So I asked Rory to finish watering the last two trees and it was neat to leave him with that and have him take some responsibility while I went to warm Paxton up. It's amazing how he likes to work and loves to feel he is contributing.

I believe we were designed to work and feel best when we are productive. I was so tired after school and I did the very best thing I could have. If I had sat down and watched TV instead (which is what I felt like doing), I wouldn't have felt nearly as good. The result was that I felt re-energized, the boys and I had fun and some trees got planted.

Soccer went well. Does anyone have any ideas for warm-up/ practice or drills for four year olds? I tried to partner them up and kick back and forth to each other but that ended up all over the place - pretty funny. But I do like things to be a little more orderly if possible.

This morning I went outside with the boys to do some weeding in my flowerbeds. Rory took his three shovels to a patch surrounding a tree nearby and started working on it. He talks constantly as he works away. I heard something like this: "This is my work...right, Mommy? I'm going to do this every morning. It's my work...big job. You aren't allowed to see it until I'm done. You and Dad and Grandma and Grandpa...no one can see this big job.....I'm going to do this every day....I'm making a big hole.....that's for the cat's poop."

Problems on top of problems....

Seeding can be stressful. Yesterday was the first time Ladger was able to get to the field for a few days because of the weather. And he was planning to finish up a field that had to be redone because some hoses had been plugged when he seeded it the first time. That means there would be strips with no plants all over the field. As if reseeding isn't enough of a setback, the hydraulic hose sprung a leak and everything came to a grinding halt. He went to town to get the hose fixed and finally after supper got going again. He should have been able to finish the field and get the seeder moved to another field last night but.... the hose hadn't been fixed properly and sprang a leak again. And that was that. He had to wait until this morning to go to town to get the hose 'refixed' and apparently it was done better this time because I can see that he's finally done and off to the next field. Hopefully there won't be more delays this spring as we have a long way to go yet!

It's still cool but yesterday I did go outside and do some pruning and transplanted some perrennials. The tulips are going to start blooming soon but I found my first flower of the spring - a Johnny Jump-up - looks like a miniature pansy. It's under my deck of all places!

April (snow) showers...

Bring May Flowers? I can't wait for that! We're supposed to have a wiener roast tonight. I guess it's going to be a wiener boil instead ' cause we'll have to be inside. It snowed all day yesterday. Now most of it has gone already but it still feels icy outside. And tonight is Rory's AWANA closing. He didn't want to eat lunch because he was waiting to eat 'wieners'. That would have been a long wait. After hotdogs, we'll have the award ceremony and Rory has to recite a verse: I Timothy 4:10 - "We trust in the Saviour of all men".

This morning was the first Sunday we had our pastor back from a missions trip to Poland. He certainly must have had crazy week as he landed in Canada and had a board meeting this week as well as prepare a sermon on the Resurrecton of Jesus Christ. I thought the timing was neat as Easter is celebrated today in the Greek Orthodox Church. Our worship team was on and again, it was a special blessing to me - to be part of such a team! Our team is now not on again until July and I think we're all sorry about that - I will definitely miss it.

On the other hand, I'm grateful for a little respite to start focusing my attention on some things that have been let slide for the last few weeks - like my housework and bookkeeping. And soon I'll have lots to keep me busy in the yard and I also have a music recital coming up at the end of May that my students are working hard to prepare for. So I won't be getting bored any time soon.